


Ten Kisses (learn to knock first, bastard)

by Maelstrom_Prince



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Basically the classroom kiss but I kidnapped it and ran, Boys Kissing, Canon-Typical Violence, Eventual Smut, First Kiss, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Heartbreak, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Power Play, Rating May Change, Switching
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-09
Updated: 2019-11-15
Packaged: 2020-08-13 13:22:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 17,050
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20174956
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maelstrom_Prince/pseuds/Maelstrom_Prince
Summary: The first kiss was an accidentThe second was curiosity, so were 3, 4, 5 and 67 was goodbye8 was to break9 was for repair10 was a welcome homeGetting punched square in the jaw was totally worth it when rubies pull the blue of Naruto’s eyes inward, consuming the sky under a bloody volcanic hue. Gleaming with sorrow, cruelty, revulsion and everything Sasuke’s ever known to call home.Maybe if the fire in their bodies were to be set free, would the field be set aflame? Would they even feel the heat, smothered under the presence of each other?





	1. accident

His balance wasn't the only thing knocked off-kilter as Naruto's head fell forward, feeling the whole world submit to its gravitational pull downward. 

Bare bones clacked against Sasuke’s with a painful snap. The click of teeth sounds like the haunting echo of a key unlocking, and he feels exposed like never before. Pearly whites exposed to the intrusion as they are abruptly knocked upon, like the rap of fists to the vulnerability beneath his flesh. 

_Raw, completely unlike knuckles to his skin, where he’s learned to protect, where his walls are built high and the sting doesn’t hurt anymore._

Lips chewn by biting tameless remarks slide treacherously over the perfectly poised pink of classroom dried skin. Like a stone thrown to strike the surface of tranquil water, the disturbance is fast, instant in its impact, and departs as abruptly as its barrelled entrance.

The kiss is brief, and Naruto clambers away like a thief scared to be caught taking something that wasn’t his. Unaware he’d been mercilessly spun at the unwavering calm of Sasuke’s resolve until he’d already flung himself away to access the damage. 

It was an accident, but Naruto is about to be sick with the spinning sensation winding his stomach into an elaborate coiled mess. He tries to form words, but his tongue sits useless, heavy in his mouth, perhaps nailed there by the stunning shock of its own close encounter.

He expects the stoic Uchiha to look like Naruto feels, disgusted and horrified. But somehow he doesn’t —just a distorted reflection of the expression messily scrawled across Naruto’s own features. Mostly just surprise. Sasuke’s hand lying against the table twitches, as if it were physically resisting the urge to check if the warmth from Naruto’s lips still lingered there.

Naruto can’t tell if he’s even breathing under the electrical hum of white shock. When the screech of female vocal chords pop the bubble of building panic contained within him, his legs scramble under him. 

A forceful instinct slams him in the back and bites his heels. He runs with the sound of his furious heartbeat in his ears. 

-Thump, _ thump, thump-thump _ ** _thumpthump-_ **

Naruto is determined to pretend it didn’t happen. 

_ [He’s good at pretending things don’t happen the way they do.]_

Halfway down the hall of the academy, he collides with Iruka-sensei, and the immediate hiss of his own name as classroom papers drift the ground around them is enough to pull him from the event. 

He’s made to pick up the papers and carry them back to the classroom. He tells himself the thunder in his chest is just the sound of his heavy steps against hardwood floors. 

He doesn’t notice Iruka’s concerned gaze staring down at him from behind. He forgot to laugh._ “—Haha, sorry Iruka-sensei!” _ He forgot to complain at being made to carry a stack of papers back, _ “—Mou, but sensei—” _ too busy being thankful for the distraction.

The classroom door slides open effortlessly. His eyes are open, but he’s not_ looking _. 

He refuses to meet anyone’s face, and heads straight for the back of the classroom. 

It’s not unusual for Naruto to zone out in class; the teaching environment provides little stimulation for him and it drains Naruto of energy and enthusiasm quickly. Under the table, he’s peeled away all the paint and sealer- can feel the splinters painfully lodged under his fingernails, but it doesn’t bother him much. 

The bell rings, and Choji takes it upon himself to wedge his elbow into Naruto’s side to pull him out from his dazed stupor. He waits until almost everyone is gone before he walks down the steps of the classroom. Counting them as he goes. A black smudge in the corner of his vision catches his eye, and he dares to briefly pause and look up. 

Regret shudders in his chest when dark intense pools of the Uchiha’s sights catch him, threaten to drown him. His eyes squint judgingly, as if trying to narrow the windows to his soul. He swallows shallowly, and falls back on practiced disgust of his bottom lip jutting out in an unimpressed pout. 

This is the part when Sasuke is meant to scowl. Carve deep lines into his pale forehead and slide his bottom jaw ever-so-slightly to the side. 

But he doesn’t, just _ stands there _looking at him, studying him as if he were a specimen under a microscope. And if anything, he would think the bloody bastard stayed back just to bore his cold, dead eyes into Naruto’s turbulent whirlpools. Waited for him to pass just to throw him off, flex his upright posture over Naruto’s hunched shoulders and show how much better he was. How undeterred he was by the whole kerfuffle.

_ ‘To hell with that,’ _ Naruto thinks bluntly. He stubbornly squares his back so straight he can feel the ache down to his toes, breathes deeply into the fire in his body and lets the heat expand his chest outward. 

“What the hell are you looking at, Bastard?!”

The jerk has the gall to _ smirk _at him in non-verbal reply, and Naruto finds himself wishing he knocked that smug look right off his pretty-boy face when he had the chance. 


	2. trial and error

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto discovered that he doesn’t need oxygen in the moment of ground shattering realisation. It feels like his body learned to breathe through his skin and clothes, inhale his fury and exhale roaring screams.

Things go by as usual, and Naruto almost starts to forget about it. Even with them being lumped on the same team, passing Kakashi’s test by the skin of their teeth and almost dying in the Land of Waves.

_ Almost. _

But Naruto’s mind keeps focusing on the way Sasuke’s body dropped to the ground in the prison of frigid ice and death. How time seemed to slow down in that moment, brain unable to process or acknowledge that Sasuke had just taken a lethal blow for him. For _ him. _

_ For the village rat.  _

Naruto discovered that he doesn’t need oxygen in the moment of ground shattering realisation. It feels like his body learned to breathe through his skin and clothes, inhale his fury and exhale roaring screams. 

Sasuke’s cooling body lies limp in his arms as he cradles the boy in a too-tight grasp. He never wanted to hold Sasuke like this. He has so much hate, and he can feel it all funnel outward in a gust of hot wind and hold the air around him captive. 

Doesn’t know which he hates more—the feeling itself, or Sasuke, for being the only one that could dare rouse the cursed beast from within his cage. 

When the battlefield has fallen into a slumber, the threat sliced from existence by the edge of Zabuza’s blade—Naruto has to twist his lips into a jagged line to stop the sadness falling out. Throws it into his darkest cavern and locks the door up in chains. 

He doesn’t look at Sasuke— _ really  _ look at Sasuke, the whole way back. He knows it’s grating on the other boy’s nerves because the snide remarks, custom designed specifically for his flaring temper, are relentless. 

Maybe almost dying made Sasuke realise that he still has so many shitty things he still needs to rub Naruto’s nose into. 

It rains on the last stretch home, and Naruto has never been so thankful to get home and eat a steaming bowl of cheap ramen goodness. He doesn’t care about the mud he tracks through the entrance of his apartment; the shitty carpet and aged floorboards were beyond redemption, anyway. 

He yanked open the window to help clear out the humid scent of mould that arose every time it rained. He shucks off his jacket and shudders at the chill skittering up his arms, leaving a trail of goosebumps in its wake. 

A rude and unexpected series of knocks hammers against his door. He glares at the offending sound from over the kitchen bench, the pot in his hand barely a third filled under the tap. 

It’s probably the landlady, and for that reason he considers not opening it for a brief second before he curses and the door swings open. He didn’t lock it behind him, it seems. 

Relief at it not being the landlady is rudely doused when Sasuke, of all people, steps through his door like  _ he _ owns the place. How does he even know where he lives?

“Oye, Bastard! What’s the point of knocking if you were gunna’ come in anyway?”

He receives a single raised eyebrow in turn. “What’s the point of having a door if you weren’t going to close it properly? Idiot.” It’s phrased like a question, but Naruto’s not dumb enough to think it was one. 

“I shouldn’t have to—and why’re you here anyway? Don’t you have a—” Naruto bites his tongue to stop the words _ —big, empty, creepy cold house— _ sneaking out from under his control. Because there it is again, the image of Sasuke’s body crumpling under his own weight, blood dribbling over his lips and an unnervingly peaceful look in his eyes.

_ Sasuke doesn’t belong with the dead.  _

His mouth closes with an audible clack. He glares, and goes back to filling up the pot with water. He’s not going to host the jerk, he’s not welcome. The Uchiha doesn’t seem to care about receiving permission either, and goes about putting down his rucksack and hanging his own sopping jacket over the back of one of the two dining chairs. 

Neither of them comment when Naruto slides a carton of warm noodles over to his side, alreading hoovering into his own. 

Sasuke’s face bunches up in disgust when he lifts the noodles to his lips. He quickly swallows, and briefly lowers his chopsticks. “Salty.” He grunts, clearly unimpressed.

“Hey! Don’t waste my food, asshole!” Naruto yells, appalled at the blatant lack of appreciation for the sacred meal provided to him by the grace of Naruto’s own kindness. 

“You have it, then.” Sasuke remarks, lip curling as he slides the bowl over to Naruto’s side again. 

“Ungrateful bastard.” 

“Gluttonous feral.” 

Naruto doesn’t even know what that  _ means,  _ but he’s still pissed at being called feral. It sits wrong in his stomach, makes him feel heavy. He curses at himself when he’s suddenly not as hungry anymore. 

Trust  _ Sasuke  _ to somehow find a way to make  _ ramen  _ unappealing. 

After a little while of basking in the subtle patter of rain and slurp of Naruto’s disastrous eating habits, Sasuke spoke. “You never said how you defeated that hunter-nin.” He asked. 

“Haku. His name was Haku,” Naruto corrected, instantly disliking where the conversation was headed. “I told you before. I don’t remember,” He adds on simply, unwilling to relive the details. 

“You don’t  _ remember? _ ” Sasuke reiterates, sounding irritatingly skeptical. No doubt ready to express how  _ stupid  _ Naruto’s excuse was.

“Yes!” He stands, chair knocking back to the floor with a loud bang. “Yes! Okay,  _ I don’t remember! _ I was just  _ angry  _ and I was  _ freaking out  _ and then—” Naruto stops again, chewing on the inside of his lip in frustration. 

“...and then?” The smooth and cocky words urge him on.

“And then  _ nothing!”  _ he snarls, thoroughly pissed off. 

“You  _ seriously  _ expect me to believe you just,  _ don’t remember— _ after you defeated the Nin  _ both  _ you and I couldn’t just moments before—” Sasuke’s voice drops low, finally,  _ finally  _ betraying his facade of calm. 

“Damn it, you bastard—!” Naruto’s hands fist against the table, barely containing the swinging punch he’s played out in his head three times already. 

“Or is it the fact you  _ did  _ defeat him that’s stopping you? What,  _ you too scared  _ to acknowledge you actually did some damage for once?” he hisses, and Naruto has his fist wound back before he knows what’s happening. 

They knock the table and chairs over, and it takes Naruto a second to realise that he’s actually landed not one but several hits to his teammate lying on the floor. He coughs, the sound wet. 

He remembers all the injuries under Sasuke’s clothes. Wounds that he should have too, if he hadn’t had them healed by a monster. The same monster that is becoming fattened by all the bloody burning anger he’s been feeding it. It’s right under his skin—he can feel it latch onto his limbs and fill them with power and  _ hate. _

Sasuke looks up at the boy sitting over his stuttering chest, as if he too, was stunned by the prospect Naruto actually landed his punches. He pauses over Naruto’s terrified face, and slowly, cautiously, lifts a hand to grab at Naruto’s face. 

“Is this... how you did it?” He asks, a chesty cough at the end. 

“I—” Naruto tries, before he is brought to a jarring stop by the sound of something breaking inside of him. He knows his eyes are red. He can feel the searing heat of Sasuke’s grip on his jaw, forcing him to not look away as he studies the phenonium of polished rubies shining back at him from inside Naruto’s skull.

“I—I didn’t _mean _to,” he gasps, glassy tears blurring his vision. “I thought you were _dead_. I thought—I thought I got you _killed_,” he chokes past the lump in his throat.

He forgets how to breathe, situated over his teammate as the horrifying predicament unravels. His skin begins to sweat as the tightness around his throat becomes suffocating._ The monster doesn't need to breathe._ He tries to gasp, but the mouth movements are silent as he greedily gulps at nothing. His tears run down his face in rivulets—he doesn’t even care to be embarrassed under the crushing weight of his panic. 

He doesn’t acknowledge his body being moved to the ground. Doesn’t hear his asshole teammate call his name. 

But he feels it when lips smack against his own again. Having only happened once before, he barely registers it before his attention has desperately latched onto it. 

His chest moves, head threatening to flop forward and feeling like it’s filled with cotton. 

And there it is again, soft lips warm against his. Coaxing them to obedience, to allow the passage of oxygen peacefully into his crying lungs. Tasting like salt and ration-bars, smelling like ramen and rain. The contact leaves, taking with it the chokehold on Naruto’s access to fresh air. 

“What the...” His brain shortcuts on words as Sasuke pretends to study a mark on the wall behind him. 

“...Hell?” He finally finds the right ending after digging around inside his frazzled brain, but it didn’t feel right anymore; he took too long. 

“Oye, ne, Sasuke, did you just—” His lips flap with building confusion. 

“Yeah, but only because you’re an idiot.” 

“...What just happened?” Naruto would never be boastful enough to say intelligence was his brightest feature, but he’s really struggling to comprehend the situation right now. If Sasuke’s giant, asshole brain could come in handy for once that’d be great.

"You freaked out and punched me." 

"No, asshole, after that!"

"Is your short term memory  _ seriously _ that bad?"

Naruto groaned deeply, dramatically scruffing fisted hands through his own tousled blonde spikes. 

They're practically in each other's laps with how close they're sitting. Possibly the closest they've been without it being an act of violence since—

Well, since they kissed last.

He thinks he may be starting to associate the invasion of the other boy's personal space with his own vulnerability. Because it seems that every time a force of nature shoves them into the cramped forbidden gap between their faces; Naruto feels jittery- like Sasuke's gobbled up his weaknesses the moment his walls are down and taken host under his skin. 

There's nowhere to hide when eyes that close can see every inch of his being.

_ [He's practiced at hiding in plain sight, and yet they still ask him why he wears orange] _

He wonders if one were to stare hard enough, if they could see the wild fire blazing away inside him, illuminating maze-like halls and chained up doors.

_ Sasuke probably could. _

Outside, the rain pours hard and loud enough to drown out his thoughts. Naruto yawns, the emotional heavy lifting leaving his body boneless in a way training never could. 

Sasuke yawns too, but it's probably just because yawns are annoyingly contagious.

They both wrinkle up their noses at the stench of their breaths mingling, and Naruto forgets all about how nice it is to have another body close to his. Clean teeth after days on a mission sounds much better. 

The other boy seems to be in silent agreeance for once, because he's halfway out the door seconds after Naruto gets up from the floor. 

It's a wonder how he even hears Naruto's muttered "thanks, bastard," from over the kitchen sink. 

But he clearly does, because his hand pauses on the door handle, knuckles white over the brass. Spits out something that vaguely sounds like "whatever, idiot," before shutting the door and leaving. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tell me what you think! what you liked, didn't, etc. I got totally carried away and yes, I will get carried away with the other chapters as well.


	3. no other reason

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto will deny that the loud galloping strides of his heart were as much excitement as they were fearful. His gaze hardens under Sasuke's scrutiny, stubborn to the challenge being laid bare. 
> 
> Sasuke lies in wait at the halfway mark, looking like he's moments away from calling Naruto a 'Scaredy-cat' before he takes the plunge.

The next time wasn't as dramatic. Thankfully, for both parties. Events around it didn't involve the aftermath of almost dying— although that seemed to be an ongoing risk for the life of Shinobi— and Naruto didn't have a chakra beast trying to rampage, which is always a nice bonus. 

Again, neither of them dared to speak about the events that transpired between them. But unlike before, Sasuke hasn't made it easy for Naruto to simply dig a hole in the ground and forget all about the kiss(es). 

He keeps sending him _ looks. _It starts at training the very next day, just a casual glance before they'd even started drills. He scans over him head to toe with a small flicker of his eyes as if expecting to find something out of place. Naruto tries not to overthink it, but an underlying worry creeps at his mind that maybe Sasuke would be scared of whatever he saw in the glowing red irises yesterday. The hardest part would be that Naruto wouldn't even blame him for it. 

It's beyond relief that washes over him when Kakashi arrives, and they fall easily into their routine of competitive rivalry. He'll never admit it, but he's never been so thankful to have his arse handed to him in a match. The sheer unyielding force behind each of the Uchiha's blows is more than enough to confirm his lack of worry around Naruto's apparent secret power. 

The second time he sends Naruto a _ look, _is a mere three hours later at the end of of a Taijutsu-only spar. The nature of the match restraints meant his chakra hasn't had the chance to flare even a little, so he knows his eyes aren't red- which is the only logical explanation for why Sasuke could be trying to eyeball him down. 

"Okay, I _ get it _ , you win, _ bastard." _ Naruto mumbles haste to break the steadily growing awkwardness. Neither of them are sweating yet, but in an effort to hide himself without looking unnerved, Naruto hikes up the hem his shirt— using it to wipe the dew from his top lip. He freezes instantaneously when the attention of his teammate _ drops. _

Naruto releases the edge of his shirt as if scorned, and the other boy's eyes yank themselves back up as he looks away to cough, sounding suspiciously forced. 

It wasn't like how Kakashi looks at his book, or how Sakura looks at Sasuke, so Naruto's not sure how to explain it. Later, he cautiously peeks at his abdomen to check the seal wasn't showing. Surely enough, it wasn't. 

Sasuke does it a few more times, each time never failing to completely weird Naruto out. At this point, he's ready to write it off as curiosity— the other boy looking for any other physical signs of Naruto's _ 'hidden abilities.' _He confronts Sasuke about it on his night watch over the camp, both Kakashi and Sakura asleep in their respective tents. Hopefully, the crackle of flames will cover their conversation. Sasuke's taken a seat on the only fallen log in the area, so Naruto soundlessly plops himself directly in front of him on the ground. 

Sasuke's inky wells follow his movement— eating the shadows around them. Pale, almost translucent skin is the colour of dusk in this lighting, dark clothes blending him seamlessly into the inked canvas of the sky. He frowns in wordless confusion at the blonde's proximity. 

"Stop looking at me." Naruto boldly declares, voice barely above a whisper.

_ "What?" _Sasuke retorts, brows furrowing.

"You keep _ looking _ at me. Like in training the other day. I don't care if it's your new and improved bastard technique, stop or I'll shove it—" Locked and loaded, Naruto's expertly crafted threat is rudely interrupted when the asshole _ scoffs. _

It would have otherwise been amusing to hear the pretentious git snort if not for it being at Naruto's expense.

"Wha- Hey!"

"Thought you were _ that _interesting, huh?" Sasuke snides evilly.

"Oh screw off, you know you were doing it!" Naruto bites, struggling to keep his voice low consciously. 

"Yeah," he finally admits. 

_ And isn't that terrifying. _

"Back up, did you just agree—" 

"Another word and I take it back." 

Naruto's lips clamp shut. He nods to himself, for the sole purpose of letting the minor win taste sweeter. His ability to stay quiet lasts for all of thirty seconds before he blurts a following, “-Ne," as if to continue.

He receives a sharp glare of warning, but it does little to halt him this time.

_ "Why _ though? My eyes aren't going to go red anymore. I can't expand like Choji, or do… whatever your eyes do—" He bubblers, stumbling over his words, trying his best to step on Sasuke's curiosity. He's lucky it's only his eyes that go red, because that's kind of like the Kekkei Genkai he's seen. 

And really, he should've expected it when Sasuke glides straight over the Sharingan comment and follows him up with- "What _ do _ they do then?" 

He swallows, wishing the swell of unease to settle in his stomach. 

"I don't really know." He grumbles through clenched teeth. He's not lying, but he hopes the nameless orphan boy image will help lead Sasuke's interest to a dead end.

Instead, the stretch of silence twists the atmosphere, flexing it like the spine of a snake around its prey. 

"I wasn't staring to check if your eyes were red." Sasuke unabashedly admits, leaning back lazily. 

"There's no other reason you would be." Naruto retorts, confidence suddenly abandoning him as jitters threaten to grab hold of his limbs.

"Really, Naruto? _ No _other reason?"

"Nope." He rebukes, popping the 'p' in tandem with a harsh tug on a grass strand in front of him.

"It's unlike you to be shy. I thought you _ liked _attention."

Naruto blames it on the fire, but he's pretty sure his ears are burning. "It's_ not the same. _ I don't want you looking at me differently because of some stupid thing I can't control— and I'm not _ shy." _ He hisses in defence. 

"So if I could prove I was looking at you for _ any other reason _ other than check if your eyes were red, you'd like it?" Truly looking like a villain with a smirk illuminated by dancing flames, the glint in Sasuke's eyes is _ teeming _ with malevolence. 

"No! That's not- _ No!" _ Naruto stutters, flustered. His breath hitches his voice to pause when Sakura's sleeping bag rustles, and he realises he's forgotten to whisper in his embarrassment. 

"Better be quiet, lest you wake up Sakura_ -chan." _ Her name lolls from the tip off the Uchiha's tongue, and Naruto's never encountered Sasuke sound so dangerous before. He briefly imagines how Sakura would react if she ever heard Sasuke call her that. It's an intriguing thought-but does little to distract him from the fact he's sweating bullets, and Sasuke's _ leaning forward. _

_ "Why?" _Naruto's voice almost fails him, his hunger for reason triumphing his caution for risking drawing the Uchiha's attention to his lips.

"Why _ not?" _ He replies quickly, looming over the blond with ease, legs stretching forward ever-so-slightly to cage him in place. 

Naruto will deny that the loud galloping strides of his heart were as much excitement as they were fearful. His gaze hardens under Sasuke's scrutiny, stubborn to the challenge being laid bare. 

Sasuke lies in wait at the halfway mark, looking like he's moments away from calling Naruto a 'Scaredy-cat' before he takes the plunge.

Their faces hit hard, courtesy to the rush to not be shown down. They both recoil when their noses awkwardly mash cartilage together. Neither have any experience kissing, but they _ know _ that wasn't right.

Naruto laughs airly and idly scratches his fingernails through the back of his scalp in nervous habit. "My bad." He whispers.

Sasuke's giant delicate pride forces him to stay quiet, but the expression on his face makes him look like someone just kicked him in the shins. He's busy glaring into the fire when Naruto perches himself upward into a crouch and presses a quick peck to the underside of Sasuke' chin.

Ninja training be damned, Naruto's instinct to flee is faster than Sasuke's to catch, only managing to wipe the scowl off his face and replace it with shock in the time it takes for Naruto to scuttle back into his tent. 

They both leave their questions tucked behind their teeth. For now, anyway.


	4. control

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Getting punched square in the jaw was totally worth it when rubies pull the blue of Naruto’s eyes inward, consuming the sky under a bloody volcanic hue. Gleaming with sorrow, cruelty, revulsion and everything Sasuke’s ever known to call home.

Contrary to popular belief, Sasuke has no idea what the fuck is going on. 

Mentally, it’s no doubt the total massacre left him— a_ little _ unhinged. Most of the time it’s just normal things; he will only ever put the left shoe on first, won’t dare leave the house without fixing his hair, won’t brush his teeth before 7:31am and how he will only dice his tomatoes with the flesh facing the chopping board. Sometimes it happens in class, a tickering under his skin as if the clock hands themselves were flicking him lightly with every passing second. The sound makes his body to jolt in barely contained annoyance; a twitch of his wrist, aching to rip the damn thing off the wall and frisbee it at Naruto’s face.

_ Naruto _ makes everything worse. The blonde dolt was somehow the bane of Sasuke’s shitty life, and that’s really saying something. His existence was too bright, too demanding, too stubborn for Sasuke’s shoestring tolerance to handle. 

Sasuke likes to have control. 

Naruto’s presence makes him want to pitch his grip on control into the trash, and strangle the idiot instead. He’s not actually sure what it is about the Uzumaki that annoys him so much. He just_ does. _

When they fall into each other, and Naruto’s lips slide ever-so-just against Sasuke’s, his mind goes blank for a solid minute. Completely robbed of thoughts, he mindlessly fumbles with the silence in his own head. It’s deafening, and he’s never felt so panicked by nothing. 

Naruto’s always been one to gravitate _ towards _ Sasuke. Which is probably why it’s so startling to see Naruto fling himself across the classroom to _ get away _ from him. Horror, smeared messily over the boy’s features entangle Sasuke’s attention, drawing him in like annoyance never did. He wishes time could slow so he could study the unusual, uncharacteristically _wrong—_ expression on Naruto’s face. He wants to hold the scarred cheeks still and study the fear prancing around in crystalline pools, manipulating currents to mercy.

Naruto isn’t scared of anything.

_ [Sasuke knows that isn’t true.] _

There’s a lot more to Naruto than what he lets on. Sasuke’s never bothered to pay attention to anyone else, too busy keeping himself from spiralling into insanity- but once he starts paying attention to Naruto, he can’t _ stop. _ Naruto grinds his teeth in class when he doesn’t know the subject, he takes purposeful detours to avoid the shopping district, he has flecks of dandruff from where his nervous habit of scratching the back of his head has irritated the skin. Nothing particularly glamorous.

He always thought Naruto shied away from people because he was naturally a rogue with lacking social skills. But as it seems, the village really _ does _ hate him. He’s stumped as to how the entire village has collectively decided to harbour so much toxicity towards the boy. He doesn’t steal, and his pranks are in central areas that attract the most attention. They’re never personal, yet the resentment so clearly directed back at him strangely is. It’s weird, and for someone who whines at every bloody thing he can—_ most likely for the sake of hearing his own voice—_ Naruto’s never said a word.

They go to the Wave, he almost dies.

Laying in Naruto’s crushing hold, his body somehow both heavier than stone and lighter than ever, Sasuke has never been so indisposed and ready for death as he was in that moment.

He falls asleep with a burst of fire and heat. He had convinced himself it was the exact moment his soul had plummeted downward. 

But no, he wakes up again, peaceful bliss ripped from him like candy from a baby. If the baby was then slapped with the same sticky, half-licked treat, when he finds out Naruto had single headedly taken the hunter-nin down.

He’s not the only one soured by the fact. Naruto’s whole face is tight, like if he relaxed the whole world would come crumbling down around him. Kakashi- other than being heavily wounded- has developed a chronic twitch in whatever hand is suspiciously closer to Naruto.

After taking down a strong opponent, Naruto should be gloating his victory, gluttonous with pride and shoving Sasuke’s nose into it. But he can’t even maintain eye contact with him for a second, and his mouth _ has _ to be filled with blood with how viciously he’s gnawed away at his lips every time Sasuke’s thrown a snide comment his way.

He decides he can’t stand Naruto ignoring him even _more_ than he can’t stand Naruto bugging him.

Following Naruto back to his dingy apartment was more impulsive than anything- Sasuke blames it on the exhaustion weakening his willpower.

But he needs to know, because _ something _ happened when Naruto took down that foreign ninja. Nothing Naruto’s ever shown in training would ever allow him to even stand a chance, a piece of the picture is missing, he _ knows _ it. Truthfully, he’d already considered that Naruto may already have a clan Dojutsu. He’s aware of the slaughter of Kekkei Genkai wielders, the stigma around the deadly advantages they give people, and in turn, the fear their presence induces. It makes the memories of the massacre come alive, invigorated with more life and rage than his father’s eyes ever held, ready to claw themselves into Sasuke’s dreams.

_ What if Naruto and his meaningless last name held more than his orphan title let on? _

If Naruto’s clan really was sliced from existence with a blade wielded by jealousy and fear, it would make sense that Naruto himself would be scared of drawing attention to his situation. Nervous in a way public shame could never achieve, at using his hidden abilities.

The blonde is a lot more shaken up than Sasuke had emotionally prepared himself to handle. Getting under Naruto’s skin is easy, he’s practiced now, burrowed in like there’s a place under there that just seems to be _ his— _

Getting punched square in the jaw was totally worth it when rubies pull the blue of Naruto’s eyes inward, consuming the sky under a bloody volcanic hue. Gleaming with sorrow, cruelty, revulsion and everything Sasuke’s ever known to call home.

They’re not in a classroom this time, and Sasuke can’t resist the hypnotic allure to grasp Naruto’s face and pull them closer.

Glassy globules form at their corners, making the bright gemstones of Naruto’s slitted eyes glisten in a picture nothing short of beauty.

Something about the word _ beauty _ strutting through his brain, shamelessly calling its claim on Naruto, snaps Sasuke back to real-time like an over flexed sheet of steel.

He panics, resolve frantically wobbling at seeing Naruto’s gasp for air.

“Naruto, oye, idiot, hey—“ He calls through the fog clouding Naruto’s hold on reality.

“Naruto—“

He moves the boy off his lap to the floor with a wince, pain creeping in like a gremlin with super bad timing. “Hey—“ He tries again, but Naruto’s whole face is going pale with lack of oxygen, his eyes strangely purple as the ocean spills back over the surface.

If he could just pause the desperate fruitless panting—

He kisses Naruto.

Covers split skin with his own, successfully stuttering the dangerous cycle spiralling Naruto downward. He pulls away fast, just to check for the change in breathing patterns.

Naruto might’ve had enough clarity to clamber out of the attack on his own by then, but Sasuke doesn’t fight the impulse to close the gap between them again. _Just for good measure._ This time, he maps the surface of the other boy’s lips, softening them with the moisture of Sasuke’s own. He’s slow to drag Naruto’s lips apart, rewarding their needy request for oxygen with relief.

They both float down from the high, and Sasuke is slammed with the urge to leave the moment his toes sink to the ground. He _needs_ to go. Or punch someone. Or something. Or anything. He cracks every joint in both hands, and it does little to quell the feeling. He needs to be home. He needs to be outside. He needs to be anywhere except here.

He gets home and tries to make dinner. Using real food this time. He stares too hard at the smudge on the kitchen window over the sink until suddenly he’s put his fist through it.

_ Well, at least the smudge is gone. _

_ [He’s a mess. It’s Naruto’s fault. It's always Naruto's fault] _

Truthfully, he does try and catch Naruto off guard trying to see his red eyes again. But he gives up fast. He theorises that like the Sharingan, Naruto is unlikely to activate them accidentally. He needs to be in an emotional state powerful enough to destabilise his _ whole _ chakra network. Something about painting fences and picking weeds makes Sasuke think that it’s unlikely to be anytime soon.

Naruto’s annoyances have always been a distraction to his training, but it’s only after that night does Sasuke make the daunting realisation that Naruto’s now distracting without even meaning to. It makes him want to punch the Uzumaki in the face, more than usual. Or…do something else, with Naruto’s face. Either works, apparently. He won’t admit how much of the day he wastes imagining doing one or the other.

His ticks have never applied to other people before. Objects and himself seemed to be only targets for his insistent need to make things perfect and orderly. That all goes wayward when he spots a single eyelash on Naruto’s cheek.

_ [There’s an eyelash on his cheek. _

_ There’s an eyelash on his cheek. _

_ There’s an _ ** _eyelash _ ** _ on his _ ** _cheek.]_ **

Sasuke has to pinch himself until the bed of his nails goes white, and skin between his fingers has gone from _ in pain _ to just _ numb- _to stop the ruthless demand to brush it off.

He can’t stop looking.

Naruto is far more toned than his oversized jumpsuit lets on.

It’s a surprise when Naruto gathers the confidence to tell Sasuke to stop.

_ [Like he hasn’t already tried?] _

The more Naruto babbles, he comes to the realisation that this whole time he thought Sasuke’s was trying to exploit his oh-so-secretive Kekkei Genkai. He supposes it’s actually a pretty sound reason for Naruto be nervous.

"I wasn't staring to check if your eyes were red." Sasuke unabashedly admits, if only to settle Naruto’s worries. Sasuke can sympathise _ (although hard to imagine) _ with the exploitation of clan power, knowing how helpless it renders you to be defined by the single factor separating you from the majority. 

No, instead he’s going to tame the candle burning away in his gut, and feed it until the blaze takes Naruto down with him. He wants to see Naruto _ squirm _ in the way his mere existence makes Sasuke’s writhe.

_ And he knows how. _

Their noses smack against each other- Sasuke’s never been so consumed in the feeling of being a fuck up.

It was Naruto’s fault, but he still feels embarrassed as if it were his.

When warm flesh presses to the underside of his chin, all the cogs in his brain stop churning.

He’s hyperaware of his own delusion of control shattering within a moment.

* * *

**Part 2. **

To keep the peace, despite the meteors raining down on what was once stable ground between Naruto and himself, Sasuke makes an effort to maintain their charade around Sakura and Kakashi. A healthy dosage of bickering and a few, very mean, totally uncalled for comments of spite.

It wasn't like they were any different in private, but an element in the chemistry between them changed. Matured into something much more powerful than before- and they were both hooked on it like a drug. It arose like pheromones triggered by deep gazes, as they scrounged around in the space where their souls brushed up against each other. Searching hopelessly blind for something they couldn't recognise.

_[Something that neither of them had ever felt like they'd crave so profoundly, having never felt it before- no name to put to the flavour that made them hunger.]_

The fourth time they kissed was planned without either of them ever having uttered a word.

It was out on the field and far away from the lonely shadowed corners of the village they called home. They sparred first; even despite having spent the whole day training, it was still just as fun, just as motivating, just as—

—The kiss was better.

Naruto had pinned the taller boy in an awkward mess of limbs. Sasuke could've easily thrown the boy off— Naruto's solid density proving no challenge for the Uchiha—but he doesn't.

It takes a little while for them to build enough confidence. Naruto looks at Sasuke's like he wants to breathe him in, inhale the darkness within Sasuke and watch it mix with his own. 

Sasuke thinks Naruto looks like a gaudy holiday decoration, all light warm colours, haloed by sunlight. He's never wanted to hold the sun before, encase the warmth with his bare hands.

_[What would it be like to reminisce in the sensation of life under his fingers, without feeling overcome by the need to destroy it?]_

They're in no rush this time, but Naruto still has that dopey look on his stupid face. The one he does when thrown a challenge and the bravado hasn't kicked in yet. Sasuke hitches his upper body up with a slide of his elbows— so they don't have to lean as far.

Blue eyes glaze over at the movement. But not in a _"wow this is about to happen"_ classic Naruto way—in a _"hey that bird over there just took a big-ass shit,"_ way. Which truthfully, is also very Naruto-like, much to Sasuke's dismay. 

Something churns in Sasuke's stomach, and he brings one of his knees up to nudge his rival back to planet earth. "Oye, Idiot." He chimes.

"This is a bad idea." Naruto quips, looking a hair's width past Sasuke's face.

"Because you're _so_ adverse to doing something for the sake of it being a 'bad idea.'" He replies, disappointment quick to sour his mood.

"Shut up, bastard. I _mean it._ What are we _doing?"_

"Why would _I_ know?"

"Because you keep—"He waves his hands around elaborately as if trying to conjure the words from thin air. "—and I'm not _Sakura!"_

Sasuke almost chokes on Naruto's words. "What does _she_ have anything to do with—_this?_" He spits venomously.

"Because she _likes_ you! And she's _a girl."_

"And I _don't_ like her."

"Well, maybe you should!"

"What, like _you do,_ Naruto?"

Something about using Naruto's first name makes the world pause.

"Or maybe you never did. Maybe you just _thought_ you did." Sasuke guesses, boring himself into the other boy and waiting for the fuse to burn itself down.

"I _do_ like her. She's awesome, and you're an asshole."

"Your preference, not mine," Sasuke replies in deadpan, flopping back to the ground. 

"What is your 'preference' then, Sasuke?" Naruto presses, a fox-like grin hiking his cheeks upward as he leans over Sasuke's unmoving form. He wouldn't have even known the blonde was nervous if his left arm wasn't twitching from where it pillared beside Sasuke's shoulder.

He studies the quivering muscles from calloused fingertips, trailing the shivers up to the curve of Naruto's jaw and landing in the bow of his lips.

_'Just you,'_ were the words he was looking for, searching for them in the pores of sun-tanned skin.

Instead, he lays there, as their lips gradually close the space between them. Thinks about the grime under his nails, grass itching his skin. Maybe if the fire in their bodies were to be set free, would the field be set aflame? Would they even feel the heat, smothered under the presence of each other?

Kissing Naruto feels more natural than being a ninja does. Their lips are windswept and sun-dried, they're not soft like new skin. Roughness creates texture, and the salt of sweat gives their hard work flavour. Naruto's tongue darts out to bring moisture to the surface where they meet; Sasuke takes the opportunity to hold it hostage with his own. Like men quenched from the brink, they drink confessions that will never willingly stray from each other's mouths. 

At some point, Naruto is confronted with the realisation that Sasuke had acquired the ability to breathe through his nose— he tangles a fist in black strands and gives them violent tug when his attempts to lean back don't work. They break with an aggressive snarl and the sound of harsh breathing. 

"Bastard, I need to _breathe."_

Sasuke's bottom jaw juts out, but no insults leap from his sealed gob. Naruto watches in hypnotised fascination as he realises Sasuke is— _is pouting._ His upturned lip is pink on the inside, making Naruto wonder if he could turn the tips of Sasuke's ears the same colour. 

They sit there long enough for the soil's moisture to absorb into their clothes. Shy kisses press to jaws, necks and lips as if scared they would mar unblemished skin with their desperation. 

They stop when Naruto's stomach gives a disgruntled gurgle. He laughs nervously and Sasuke rolls his eyes, tugging them both up onto unsteady feet. They don't hold hands, the idea not even daring to cross their minds as an option. When they come to a fork in the road that departs them home, Naruto splits off. Sasuke asks him where he was going and Naruto raises an eyebrow as if he was daft, replying simply he was going home.

"To eat that salty, glutenous plastic?" Sasuke suggests, crinkling his nose at the memory.

"You take that back! Ramen is the most amazing food ever!" Naruto shouts, pointing an accusing finger at the raven.

"It's barely _food_ at all." Sasuke retorts.

A flash of genuine hurt passes over Naruto's eyes before it's smothered under the shadow of his fringe. "I'm sorry my food doesn't meet up with your standards, bastard." He grits out, turning heel just as Sasuke's voice cuts through, sounding strained. 

"I'm making curry." 

"Good for you, asshole!" He calls out behind him. 

A groan rippled through the narrow streetway.

Naruto doesn't really think about it until there's a rap of fists against his door an hour later. When he opens it, he almost trips over the container of still-warm curry sitting on his doorstep. He picks it up, places it on the table and idly stares at it until it's cold.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey did someone say mentally unstable Sasuke POV? No?  
Oh, wonderful, here you go.


	5. for the taking

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When he reaches the crook of Sasuke’s neck, he’s quick to grab a fistful of Sasuke’s high collar and yank it from his working space. The other grumbles at him not to rip the fabric as they both hear stitches pop. Naruto snarls back, but the sound is guttural, uncoordinated in tone— serving as the only warning Sasuke gets before a sharp pain stabs into him. 
> 
> His breath is stolen from him, mouth opening in a silent gasp as one hand flexes in Naruto’s hair, gripping harshly on blonde strands as the other claws at the arm holding him still.

They had just met the Suna Genin when Naruto had started feeling darkness curdle within his gut, sloshing around like an ugly sense of foreboding. Something about the piercing sea-foam gaze directed at Sasuke made the tides rise in Naruto’s throat. Something about the red-head was unhinged, bloodthirsty in a way Naruto can barely relate to. He has only ever felt something with similar intensity a few times in his life, and both times he’s been left trembling with the aftermath of destruction. 

When he looked at Gaara, a melody sung away in his head, an age-old song of mockery, battle and fire. 

But Gaara barely looked at him, didn’t even care for his name- he only cared about  _ Sasuke.  _

_ [And really, he knows he should be used to it by now, but goddamn if it didn’t still hurt] _

Naruto prides himself on being a hopeless optimistic even in the most idiotic situations, but the exams are really starting to get on his nerves. 

Everyone just wants to challenge **_Sasuke._**_ Neji, Lee, Gaara, even those freaky Sound Ninja. _

Never before has he felt like a darker shade of orange as he stands with Sakura at the back of the room flooding with killing intent. The muscles of their baby-chubbed cheeks tense as they grind their teeth. He wonders if she feels the same way and if somehow their first real bonding is over the attention being hurdled at their teammate.

Sakura’s patience gives out with a pop from her knuckle, emanating the sound of the bubble in her chest bursting under pressure. Ino wedges Sasuke’s left arm into the scarcely formed swell of her chest as Sakura glares at her from the Uchiha’s right. Sasuke looks more dead to the world than mortified, as the girls at his sides snarl at each other like wolves over the kill. 

Naruto tries his best to ignore the solid mass growing at the base of his throat. He’s thankful for the abrupt redirection of his attention when warmth encompasses his side, and the smell of canine floods his nostrils. Kiba leans over him heavily and despite their similar heights, the boy’s broader shoulders and soft furred jacket threaten to swallow him.

The brazen classmate barks something rude in his ear; his lips are close enough to Naruto’s ear that his instinct to move away forces him to shove Kiba back to a more comfortable distance. He freezes when he feels a familiar glare aimed his way, washing over him like a shadow. 

He seeks out Sasuke’s sharpened eyes and traces the line of fury to the brunette still partially slumped over his shoulder.  _ Which is weird, ‘cus he’s never had a grudge against Kiba before- for sure, the guy has a pretty standard level of spite for pretty much everyone, and Kiba can be a total jackass, but—  _

His eyes slip to Ino; still buried in Sakura's green look of challenge, and he can almost feel the cogs aligning in his brain with a final  _ click.  _ —  _ Oh.  _

An awkward sound catches in his chest, and his face blooms into a vibrant shade of ruby.

— _ Oh. _

Like a mosquito, Sasuke notices the blood rushing to Naruto’s face instantly. A gnat in Naruto’s atmosphere, he can’t help but notice Sasuke’s attention on him. They become trapped in the dizzying spin around each other, cautiously circling the acknowledgment of their relationship. 

Naruto's face continues to flush until he can feel it creeping down his neck, and he keeps waiting for one of them to look away, or for Sasuke to smirk— but neither of them seem to be able to register what had transpired as blank eyes bore into his surface.

It leaves his tongue feeling dry. 

* * *

When they’re in the Forest of Death, everything for Naruto goes from nothing going wrong to  _ everything  _ going wrong all at once. There are bells clanging and sirens blaring in his head, attacking him with nauseating levels of overstimulation. Everything feels so  _ hot, _ and  _ cold; _ terrified and  _ determined. _

When the rattle of the cage becomes too much, when the swirl of panic threatens to consume him, he gives in— and hopes to a higher power he doesn’t kill anyone. 

Through hazed red lenses, the Monster catches the head of the giant snake between his talons. He feels the giant scales break under the grip and slice into his palms, barely noticeable as the skin stitches itself together again. The beast peels back his own front bloody lip, baring his fangs in a grin that makes a mockery of Naruto’s human face. His teeth are too big and too pointed for his mouth— sharp angles protrude from his gums in a sickening display. 

Naruto hates how selective his memory is when the painting of Sasuke’s fear-stricken expression brands itself to the back of his skull, moments before his nostrils are assaulted with the smell of burning flesh and smoke.

He doesn’t remember most of the battle before and after that point, only brief pangs of excruciating pain sparking inside his seal like flint over steel. It sets his insides ablaze, and he wonders how his skin hasn’t completely melted off his body yet. He wakes to chaos, Sakura is bruised and bloody, her hair hacked up with strands covering the ground around her. Sasuke’s entire presence is smothered under a cloud of foreign chakra, obnoxious purple markings wiggling tauntingly over his pale skin.

The Monster’s slumber has not yet been restored, leaving something feeling out of place within him. Briefly, his own anger rises at watching Sasuke demonstrate brutality he’s never given care to before. It’s flooded when an intrusive  _ hunger  _ washes over him, replaces his disgust and horror with a feeling giddy and possessive. 

His jaw creaks open, and sharpened teeth gleam between darkened jaws. He roars Sasuke’s name like a lion to the throes of battle, and red tidal waves crash against each other when their eyes meet. 

It was as though they were looking at each other for the first time. Warped back into the classroom, they stand apart with a world between them— posture flexed with challenge as they become intoxicated with power and hazed with intent. 

Lee’s team may have saved the day, but Sakura saved  _ them _ . Her voice screamed raw with desperation, yanking them back to their mortal bodies and leaving them quaking with recoil. 

Afterwards, when they’re finally back together, safe—if they dare call it that— wedged in a tree alcove, Sakura finally savours a wink of well-deserved sleep as they keep watch. It had taken forever to convince Sakura to let them take the watch without her, and despite agreeing it would be under 3 hour terms— neither boys have any intention of waking her. 

“Hey.” Naruto breaks the silence cautiously. 

He’s thrown a weak hum from under Sasuke’s breath. He can no doubt feel the swirling cerulean pools lifting the fine hairs on his neckline, just like the rise of shore on pale beaches. 

“Does it hurt?” He whispers, quietly enough Sasuke doesn’t have to reply if he doesn’t want to, letting Naruto’s voice ride away on the whistling of the breeze. 

“A bit.” He grumbles, making blonde eyebrows raise with slight surprise. 

He reaches towards the other boy, slow enough Sasuke can hear him leaning forward, the dried leaves crunching under his knees. The Uchiha stiffens when the high collar of his shirt is tucked down, but he doesn’t make any notion of moving away.

“Can I...touch it?” Naruto’s voice almost breaks with how quietly he asks. Goosebumps rise with the proximity of the sound to Sasuke’s skin, as if his sensitivity to the world rose with the other boy’s presence. 

The marred flesh jumps when Naruto’s calloused fingertips graze over the seal. It’s burning hot, and when he swipes the pad of his thumb over it, Sasuke’s shoulders sag ever so slightly. 

“What...is it?” Naruto questions aloud. 

“Why would I know?” Sasuke’s huffs, frustrated. He releases a chest full of air, before continuing, “—but, it’s...consuming my chakra. I think it’s feeding off it.”

A corrosive, dangerous feeling begins to simmer and bubble in Naruto’s core. The animalistic hunger from before fills him from his toes upward, until Naruto barely registers his own invasion of Sasuke’s space. His eager tongue dips out between his lips and paints a wet stroke of saliva over the black mark on Sasuke’s neck. 

Sasuke jolts in shock, his spine snapping him around to give Naruto a violent shove. 

Naruto looks scandalised, creases of horror under his glowing, slitted eyes. 

Sasuke may have the Sharingan, but he’s the one ensnared in Naruto’s bloody crimson orbs. He swallows shallowly and watches a red gaze follow the movement of his throat bobbing. 

“What the  _ fuck,  _ idiot?” He hisses, quick to cover his neck with a firm grip. 

“I don’t know! I just-” Naruto bubbers, quick to throw his hands up, waving them in defence.

“Just  _ what—"  _

“It just felt right! You- smell like that creep, okay!” He confesses, hoping it was dark enough his mighty blush couldn’t be seen. 

“So you tried to  _ lick  _ it off?” Sasuke spits, glaring. 

“No! But- You said it  _ feeds  _ off chakra, and—”

_ [And was he really just about to suggest he touch a foreign seal with demonic chakra from the bottomless pit in his stomach?] _

“—my uh-  _ ability,  _ it gives me really, really big reserves.” He excuses quickly as Sasuke’s slim eyebrows raise in question.

“And you want to  _ feed  _ it? Are you  _ insane?  _ This thing isn’t some...petting zoo, you dumbass!” 

“But when we were learning to tree climb- when I used too much chakra, we got blown off right?” Naruto straightens, hand motioning the explosion of chakra in front of him. The dots align together in Sasuke’s mind, and his dismay carves itself into his frown. 

“You want to  _ flood  _ it? You have no idea what it could do—” Sasuke’s tone drops. 

“—yeah, but...it  _ did  _ feel good, right?” Naruto interrupts, abruptly ending the argument as they stare at each other for a solid second, just to check if Naruto really  _ did just say that.  _

Sasuke groans after a second or two, slumping back to the ground and grinding the palms of his hands into his eye sockets. 

Naruto slinks across the forest floor with more stealth than what either of them remembers him ever having. The dip-dye of crimson within Naruto’s chakra gives him an edge, blurs him into the forest floor as his body becomes weaponized and deadly. 

“Can I…do it again?”

Sasuke glares at him, even as he lowers his knees to let Naruto climb into his lap and cover him like a cocoon of protection and heat. Their young bodies align with a fumble of adolescence, barely understanding the coil winding them closer- but aware of it non-the-less. 

Naruto bathes in the other boys’ glazed and heavy focus, buzzing with a special feeling as he feels the world around them slip away. There’s no one else in this moment, no challengers for Sasuke’s attention, it’s all  _ his _ for the taking. It makes him feel whole, filled with some unnamed desire. They waste no time leaning forward, lips locking like the snap of two magnets destined to surrender to the gravitational pull between them. Angry red magma is covered beneath the surface of Naruto’s eyelids as they slide shut. He grabs at Sasuke’s shoulders like he was scared the other would leave if he didn’t hold on for dear life. Sasuke melts under him, flesh oozing into a flexible state for the first time since the exam started. Naruto’s teeth nip at the side of his mouth before moving downward, tongue lapping at the grime on their skin like he craved the spice of adrenaline puddled in their veins.

When he reaches the crook of Sasuke’s neck, he’s quick to grab a fistful of Sasuke’s high collar and yank it from his working space. The other grumbles at him not to rip the fabric as they both hear stitches pop. Naruto snarls back, but the sound is guttural, uncoordinated in tone— serving as the only warning Sasuke gets before a sharp pain stabs into him.

His breath is stolen from him, mouth opening in a silent gasp as one hand flexes in Naruto’s hair, gripping harshly on blonde strands as the other claws at the arm holding him still. 

“Shit— _ shit,  _ you—”

A rumbling sound reverberates through the teeth buried in his neck, and it feels so good Sasuke’s whole spine aches, arching in reflex. Boiling pools cauterize the wound with bruises and Sasuke can feel Naruto's chakra flooding through him like a rampant tsunami. He feels like he’s going to drown, no matter how much air he gasps for, nothing seems to ease the force of smothering warmth. 

When Naruto’s teeth finally withdraw, blood dribbles over his lips like a predator after a buffet of slaughter. He licks his lips, gathering the copper-tasting blood over them before spitting it to the ground. 

Sasuke cringes at him, nose wrinkling as his head slumps back as he tries to catch his breath. 

The gleam in Naruto’s glazed eyes dim, briefly pausing to look over Sasuke’s exhausted posture. His grip on the shirt sleeves loosens as his eyes fade to blue, fingers tracing the outside of Sasuke's arms as he leans his sweaty forehead on the other boy's shoulder. 

“Disgusting.” Sasuke insults breathlessly, ignoring the satisfying tingle of flesh under the remaining pressure on his neck. 

Naruto pokes him lightly in the side, replying with, “ne, you should sleep.”

“So should you.” Sasuke's voice slurs. 

“Bastard.”

“Stupid.”

Sasuke passes out, and Naruto takes it as a personal win. He’s so out of it, he doesn’t even rouse when Naruto moves them back into the alcove where Sakura is. He’s careful when he lays them down next to each other, Sakura’s head limp against Sasuke’s shoulder, her beautiful strands torn to chunks. It reminds him of the first time he tried to cut his own hair, and the fact that she went to such lengths makes the bubbles in his chest swell.

He creeps to the mouth of the entrance, steps soundless. For the first time, he lets himself breathe in tandem with the predator lurking inside his bones. A protective urge linders under his skin as his ears perk to the sound of his teammate’s breathing, allowing himself be comforted by the deep rhythms. 

He will fight for this. Fight to protect it with everything he has. He’s sure of it. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so one of my awesome commenters suggested possessive naruto over sasuke's snake hickey  
I tried my best cool thanks


	6. refusal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto is truly a beast, mystified and glorious in his all-consuming devotion. He will eat everything Sasuke has to give, and then eat more, until there’s nothing left.
> 
> He cannot resist Naruto, and deep down, he wants to give in, to release his white-knuckled grip on control.

Sasuke is good at running away from things. It had never occurred to him that one day he’d be running _towards_ anything other than his own ruin. And maybe he is, running hopelessly towards something that could kill him in an instant, but he finds he’s not deterred by that anymore. 

Since the Wave, he’s been weirdly okay with the idea of dying. 

_ [He’s not sure when he became **not** okay with the thought of losing Naruto.] _

They had only sparred since, and every time leaves him breathless in a way no amount of endurance training could help prevent. Sometimes, they fight for the sake of mindlessly grappling at each other’s body, touches unhindered and familiar when spiced with violence and threat. 

They make a habit of eating at Sasuke’s place after the Sandaime dies, and Naruto appetite dwindles. His metabolism is too fast to run on nothing, and Sasuke is the first to notice when his limbs get spindly. He doesn’t actually say anything to Naruto—_ knowing the tastelessness of grieving too well himself—_ but he drops a hint to Sakura. She’s furious, and chews him out for days about eating correctly, and how can’t let himself waste away. 

He grins ear to ear, sheepishly whining, _"mou, but Sakura-chan,”_ with one hand itching the back of his hair, despite them all knowing how transparent he was. Despite them all knowing it was Sasuke that noticed. Because when they lay at the base of a tree and watch the night dig its roots into the honey hue of day, Naruto chooses not to look at the sky. He presses his tired body flush to Sasuke’s front and hides his face in the cradle of Sasuke’s neck. He winds his dirty hands into navy fabric and traps the other boy in the clasp of his grip. 

Sasuke almost lets himself fall into Naruto’s hands. Still, every time he finds himself caught, the split second of clarity that shocks him awake before he dozes off. Instead, his fingers seek the folds of Naruto’s clothes, slithering under them as if to seek warmth. For no reason other than to feel Naruto’s weight against him, the rise and sink of flesh atop of his bones. He bows his head with the fall of sunset, tucking his chin into mused blonde strands to press a light kiss to Naruto’s head. Content that Naruto will never have to know— and that Sakura, standing at the base of the hill— will finally have her questions answered. 

He stubbornly realises that Naruto may be the only thing in his life that he never has to doubt. The one unmoving pillar willing to hold the entire goddamn estate up, even as it crumbles from under their feet. He lets Naruto latch onto him, unaware of Sasuke’s own barbs sinking into sun-kissed skin, hooking himself in. He will not allow himself to be overwhelmed by the love of another, he must remain in control. 

Naruto is truly a beast, mystified and glorious in his all-consuming devotion. He will eat everything Sasuke has to give, and then eat more, until there’s nothing left.

He cannot resist Naruto, and deep down, he wants to give in, to release his white-knuckled grip on control. 

_ [But deeper down, where the sun cannot breach, a sludge of disgust, fear and everything ugly, smears its bloated belly over the seafloor. And it **hates** for Naruto for having that power over him.] _

Naruto’s love is dangerous, and Sasuke refuses to let himself bleed. 

It was by complete fluke he’d overheard the jounin talking about Itachi. He was seeking out Kakashi after he’d been informed some jounin had been attacked recently by Missing Nin. He wasn’t worried, he just felt it was his business if his instructor was put out of commission. 

Not that the man had a lot of time for them anymore— with the village low on experienced Ninja and no Hokage— Kakashi and other Jounin had been spending less and less time with their teams as they took on other responsibilities. 

Without training, his mind starts to slip from focus. Sasuke had been pent up since the invasion, frustration eating away at him like a hoard of termites to his foundations. He starts to remember things, like the dents on the rail he’d made when Kiba dared to taunt Naruto in a way that was reserved for _him_\- _not that Kiba's dull words could ever graze Naruto’s skin._ The bud of pride that dared to grow when he saw Naruto rise above the insultingly low expectations set. How Naruto’s determination, unwaveringly inspiring, soaked into his soul and bloomed his pride into something blinding. The way his chest filled with chilling stone when Naruto lept after Gaara, and they morphed into giant creatures of gladiator proportions. 

Unfortunately, unlike Naruto, Sasuke doesn’t have endless reserves, and he’s sure if he stops running even for a second, his legs will freeze up and refuse to move again. Itachi is back, and he’s after _Naruto._ Why _Naruto?_

He refuses to let Itachi take the only thing he can call his own again. 

* * *

Naruto sees Sasuke’s body slam against the wall before dropping to the ground as if it were filled with lead. Naruto does not know this man, but he knows **of** this man, and he’s caused more hurt to Sasuke than Naruto will ever learn to forgive. For the first time in his life, Naruto is wholly paralysed with hatred. 

With Orochimaru, he had been terrified, loose, unattached. Set ablaze and ready to burn. 

But this stoic man, claiming to be after the Nine-Tails, had awoken something else within Naruto. It set his jaw back in his mouth, caressed him with calm and bathed him with icy resolve. He keeps his eyes set on a pale chin, shadowed by a wide brim hat. 

_“Don’t look him in the eyes!”_ Sasuke’s voice rasped from under a crushing fist. 

The Monster purrs under his skin, quivering with agitated excitement as Naruto maintains his deadlock on its influence, fist buried in its scruff. His stance is wide, bowed to the ground in a mockery of submission. He knows he cannot defeat this murderer. He will not die trying. He will live, he will escape, he will get Sasuke out of here and as far away from this man as possible. 

They approach him, and the blue one threatens to savagely remove one of his legs. His partner is much less brazen, and he analyses the drastic switch in Naruto’s display. He lets himself be studied in silence until the moment they realise he’d been stalling. Jiraya arrives with a bang and clatter, a barrel of noise echoing his voice as the hallway sinks into the belly of the Sannin’s Jutsu. A flash of insane heat washes over them, and Naruto watches with amazement when black flames lick at the ground as the Missing Nin disappear. 

His attention does not linger on the retreating threat. He crouches by Sasuke’s slumped body, appearing so vulnerable in it’s crumpled form on the floor. As he listens to the scratch in Sasuke’s breath, the anger slowly seeps from his mind. 

“Sasuke?” He asks, hoping more than ever to hear Sasuke’s grouched huff of reply. 

“Oye, bastard, _Sasuke-”_ He tries to hold up the other boy's chin, but the muscles are lax, and his head droops in his hand. Naruto’s breath catches at the sight of open, but dulled and unfocused eyes. 

_ [Naruto’s never been so paralysed by the thought of not being seen. And Sasuke knew, he knew how scared Naruto was at the feeling of being invisible] _

“This isn’t funny, you bastard!” He yells, hating how scared he sounds as he grips Sasuke’s shoulders with more force than he’d knowingly ever allow. 

He feels the gentle hand of Jiraya land on his shoulder, steady and grounding. “He’s in a Genjutsu, Naruto. He’s not waking up.”

“Then get him out of it! You’re a Sanin!” He pleads, knowing the desperate tone revealed more than what we were comfortable giving away. Jiraya had only ever seen _“Believe it!”_ and _“I can do anything, you just watch Pervy Sage!”_\- Naruto. Naruto had never intended to show him this castle built with brittle bones. 

“I can’t. But, if we find Tsunade, she could.” The older man explains, unknowingly setting the concrete in Naruto’s mind.

They _do_ manage to find Tsunade, and Naruto has never snapped as ferociously at an adult for their life choices as what he did with her. He unflinchingly accepts her bet, and leaps headfirst into training. His hands blister and bruise, experiencing true exhaustion for the first time on the third day. 

They all ask why he’s trying so hard. 

He thinks about Old-Man Jiji, sitting with him by a campfire as a tyke. Thinks about the friendly chirp of voice that greets him at the Ramen stall, followed by the steam of salty broth as Iruka sits beside the tower of bowls. Thinks about the sound of Sakura’s voice like wind chimes in the breeze of spring. 

He thinks about where Sasuke lies unmoving and cold under covers, trapped in a loop of tragedy after he’d thrown himself into someone _else’s_ kidnapping. How his pale and thin lips don’t move against Naruto’s shy and lonely kisses, wanting so badly for one of those fairytale miracles from children’s stories. He waits for Sasuke's thin, precise fingers to reach around him, card through the back of his hair and drag lines down the corded muscle of Naruto's neck. But he doesn't, doesn't move, and Naruto feels himself begin to unravel. He slides from the comfort of the bed, and goes back to training. 

_“I’m doing it because the people I care about are in **your** hands, Grannie!”_ He yells from the centre of the crater filled field when she tells him to give up. 

Like that was **ever** an option. 

He does master the Rasengan. 

Tsunade comes back to the village.

Sasuke wakes up. 

Naruto is the only one in the hospital room when Sasuke wakes up. Sasuke’s face scrunches with disgust, and Naruto flings himself to the boy’s side. Sasuke elbows him the face, groaning in discomfort at the giant blonde barnacle he’s acquired— and Naruto makes it clear he couldn’t care less, hugging tighter. 

Sasuke finally manages to hook his fingers between his weakened body and Naruto’s greedy fingers, giving him a rough shove backward. Hurt cascades through Naruto’s already vulnerable state, leaving him defensive and ready to bite back, _just to show the bastard how it feels_. 

Sasuke yells at Naruto to fight him, loathing disgust coating his voice. He should’ve known that Naruto is not emotionally practised enough to do anything but return violence with violence. 

Kakashi luckily intervenes at the last moment. It’s only when Naruto’s fist is wedged knuckle deep in the warped steel of a water tank does clarity come back to him. 

His hands won’t stop shaking, he’s overwhelmed by so much _anger_, so much _guilt_— 

_  
[It's his fault, it's always his fault]_

He goes home to clear his mind some, and falls asleep to the lullaby of his own sadness. He’s ripped from his peaceful ignorance to Sakura’s crying wails outside his door, as her fists collide with the wood like hooves of stampeding wildebeest. 

“Naruto, he’s _gone!_ Sasuke's **_gone!”_**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You ready? Shit's about to get _s a d._
> 
> And also NSFW in later chapters. Woo (rating will change) 
> 
> Please leave a comment, it really helps with motivation, and I read everything many times over! I value your feedback as much as you value my stories ^^


	7. goodbye

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _[“Does it hurt?” ]_
> 
> Because it hurts. Leaving Naruto _hurts. _
> 
> _[“A bit.”]_

Naruto’s rattling scream echos over the valley. Voice scratched by the rasp of his heart quite literally breaking at the sight of Sasuke turned away from him. 

** _“Sasuke!”_ **

Sasuke can feel all the blood rush through his body. He’s hyperaware of every prickle and shiver of his skin in response to the sharp wind. He’d felt himself slink from the encompassing seals and stagnant air within the container, feeling anew with a thrum of power. He feels disconnected from his body, his mind filled with assurances that bloat him with confidence. 

This feeling, this is what will protect him. Orochimaru has given him the means to free himself from the starving maw of the leaf. The further he runs, the clearer it shows how desperate and greedy the Fire Nation had been to keep him for themselves. They wanted him, his Sharingan, firmly clenched in the grip of their sweaty palms, ready to be played on the chessboard for political power. They were no different from Orochimaru, the only separation being that Orochimaru was clear with his warnings and intentions. He was willing to give Sasuke the means to claim his own desired fate, as long as they obeyed by the Sanin’s own plans, of course. 

_ ‘For now, anyway,’ _Sasuke muses as an afterthought. 

Sasuke will never go home— can’t. Home for Sasuke was buried six feet under the decaying soil of his family’s cemetery. 

Naruto doesn’t understand. May never understand his home is a place of power corruption and rapacity. He loves blindly and selfishly, begging Sasuke not to go, not to give in. When truly, the only thing Sasuke had ever been in threat of giving into, was _ Naruto. _

* * *

When Sakura had seen him by the village gates, standing under the sickly yellow hue of a lamppost with his back-pack slung over his shoulder, even _ she _understood more than Naruto. She was always a smart girl, he had known she was. He thinks that with him gone, she may finally have the attention to devote towards something far greater than him.

“Sasuke, don’t do this,_ please.” _ Her lip trembles under her words and the pinch of her skin reveals how hard she’s trying not to cry. 

“What about Team Seven? What about _ Naruto?” _ The emphasis on their teammates’ name presses in her voice as the final straw in her arsenal. The tone of her voice is crippled with sadness, showing her awareness of Naruto and his relationship far before he had tauntingly laid it bare for her to see. 

He walks into her space, closer than what he’d ever willingly done before. He reaches up slowly, and tucks a messy strand of hair behind her ear, bringing light to her shadowed expression of grief. The action is soft and unthreatening, catching her attention faster than any comment of insulting nature. She looks at him through blurry emerald eyes, daring to shine with a glimmer of hope. 

  
None of this is her fault. She had been sheltered within the village, cradled by her loving and supportive parents. She had fought with and for him. She had made sacrifices in his name. 

“Don’t come after me.” He says simply, a clear and sharp whisper that cuts the thread of hope within her heart. 

Her breath catches in a hiccup, and he takes the moment to step away from her. 

“I won’t. But Naruto will. I can’t stop him, he _ will _come after you.” She snaps with frustration, voice harshly pointed at the ground. 

His steps don’t falter, but he casts a solemn look at the towering village gates ahead of him, waiting a suspenseful moment before replying over the crunch of gravel, “-I know.”

_ ["—and I'm not Sakura!" _

_ Sasuke almost chokes on Naruto’s words. "What does _ ** _she _ ** _ have anything to do with—this?" He spits venomously.] _

* * *

Lo and behold, here he is. Clashing with an enraged version of Naruto he’d never wholeheartedly been on the receiving end of before. It was invigorating to surrender to the dance of battle, their hands becoming lost the twist and twirl of chakra as it was thrown around their bodies. Fighting had never felt like this with anyone else, no one had ever matched him so perfectly than what Naruto so clearly did. His lack of skill destroyed any illusion of grace in his movements, but the sheer raging force behind his mindless hits more than made up for it. He had the persistence of something wild, and no matter how many hits he took, he always, _ always _came back to return it double.

With every level of escalation they rose to, Naruto was ready to match him. Sasuke felt his weight shift with a new wave of cursed power coursing through his veins, pulling him forward as a tremendous pain tore through him. His spine shifts along his back, rippling as his muscles realign, and he feels his humanity slip ever so slightly.

He stares across the white water spray of the waterfall, to see Naruto’s body become encased in a bubbling layer of visible boiling chakra. Those beautiful, sharp rubies angrily scrawled with betrayal and harrowing desperation stare him down. Feral expression stretches his cheeks into a tooth baring snarl, and Sasuke remembers the heated pool in his navel when those same teeth were buried in his skin. A wet and hungry taste for the claim printed into the Uchiha’s pale flesh. 

Every time they would kiss, they would make peace with their loneliness within each other. Sasuke had taken to filling his hands with the meat at Naruto’s sides, under his ribs where unmarred, perfect skin of his waist lay vulnerable. Naruto was terrible at multitasking, and often became overwhelmed when Sasuke dared to challenge him with more touch than at his lips. 

Sasuke _ wants _Naruto to be overwhelmed by him, wants to render his mind useless under Sasuke’s grasp.  


Naruto is not ready to understand why Sasuke must leave.   


With a ground-shaking yell, their inhuman forms savagely collide. There’s a second of silence when time appears to simultaneously slow, leaving them close enough to see the emotional pain muddled under fear, anger, and guilt. 

Naruto misses— like he knew he would. Knew with certainty that even when overtaken by his monstrous curse, Naruto would never fatally hurt Sasuke. Those elongated claws wouldn’t hesitate to draw blood along his pale body, but only ever to bring that mass of heat closer. 

Sasuke hits his target. He’d had the point of impact calculated long before he’d left the village. He’d seen the map of Naruto’s chest many times before, traced the dips and junctures of his neck with lips and fingers when Naruto had allowed. He knew the very spot along Naruto’s torso that he would one day dig an electrified palm of lightning into. Knew how hard to push, how careful he would need to be to perfectly paralyse Naruto in his own shock. 

Nothing he could have done would have prepared him for the sheer panic of seeing Naruto’s whole body slump in his hold. His fist warm as it sat between Naruto’s ribcage and violently quivering muscles. Tears of pain and shock bobbled over from the corners of bruised eyes. 

“Uguh.” Naruto groans in pain, blood steadily flowing over his bottom lip. Sasuke is frozen with fear, _ what if he miscalculated? _

_ [“I thought you were dead. I thought—I thought I got you _ ** _killed,”_ ** _ ] _

He slowly lowers them to the ground and pulls his hand from Naruto’s chest as he feels the cavity begin to tighten with Naruto’s inhuman healing. Naruto gives a wet cough as he does so, making Sasuke pause to adjust his grip to make sure the blood does not choke the boy. He hates the cold in his bones and the tightness in his throat. 

The exhaustion begins to hold his body captive as the cursed seal’s power slinks into the back of his mind. He unties his hitai-ate, eyes scanning over the slash through the middle. 

He will never fight for the Leaf again.

He considers trying to destroy the headband, but a simple glance at Naruto sways his decision. He places it on the ground next to Naruto’s sleeping form as he leans down. 

The sky begins to clear, the sun peeking through the doom of dark clouds to illuminate Naruto’s sleeping expression, appearing nearly tranquil. He cards his shaking, stinging fingers through stained blonde strands of hair, noting a pale eyelash resting on a purpled cheek. 

_ [There’s an eyelash on his _ ** _cheek.]_ **

He studies the bow of Naruto’s lips, taking the time to steel himself. When he finally presses his mouth to Naruto’s, something within him gives way. Naruto tastes like blood, not like Naruto. The angle is all wrong, and Naruto’s breaths are barely stable enough for him to feel against his face. He jolts himself up from the ground, taking more steps back than he has to, just to force distance between them while he still has the mind to. 

“Goodbye, Naruto.” He chokes out as he slowly feels himself become breathless. 

He carves the image of Naruto’s limp body bathed in sunlight into his mind before he turns heel and_ runs. _

_ [“What, you too scared to acknowledge you actually did some damage for once?”] _

Every step makes him wonder if _ he’s _the one with the gaping, bloody hole in his chest. 

_ [“Does it hurt?”] _

Because it hurts. Leaving Naruto _ hurts. _

_ [“A bit.”] _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, hey! Sorry about the wait, here's the main big sad™ before the following chapters are more...frustration and sexytimes? Last chapter may be back to angst. (just a little, sorry) After this point it's going to move a little further from canon - Because uh, I got 5 chapters to work with, and I just wanna focus on them being cute and in love.
> 
> All the _[in box text]_ in this chapter were references from previous chapters. 
> 
> Tell me what you think? Pretty please?


	8. to break

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He would've cried out that he was going to break, if only they didn't already know that he was a broken man— fractured in at least ten places at any given time, his heart brutally divided by the chunk Sasuke had laid claim on all those years ago.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Smut warning!**  
Underage smut! 17ish.  
(Skippable!)

When Naruto wakes up on the crisp white hospital sheets, he instantly knows something is wrong. For one, the Jinjuuriki does not end up in the Konoha hospital very often, rarely overnight. He blinks away the crusted sleep clumped between his eyelashes, coughing the moment his dry tongue lifts from the bed of his mouth. 

The door slams open in tandem with the heart monitor raging to life as he coughs harder. A hand slides behind his head and back, supporting him as the bed slowly inclines to sit him upright. A foam cup and plastic straw are held steady in front of him. He sips at it enthusiastically, grateful when the buildup residue in his mouth is finally able to be washed down. 

"Easy, brat, easy." Tsunade's firm voice carries him down from his discomforted panic as he concentrates on the small chore of breathing. The moment his lips draw away from the straw, his arm slinks under the rough box printed fabric of the gown he's wearing, a single finger beginning to trace over the smooth skin of his sternum. 

Instantly, he engages in a battle within himself to shove down the terrifying ray of hope that dares to say it was a bad dream. He wouldn't be in the hospital if it were. He looks up when Tsunade reaches forward to pull his arm away from where they both know he should still be wounded. Having had inhuman healing all his life, he's never once thought it weird to not scar. But as his fingers trace the very place Sasuke's fingers once did, he can't help but feel like something is missing. There's a lingering pain that seems to go deeper than his skin, and for a brief moment, he considers asking Grannie if she healed him wrong. 

"You did your best, Naruto." She says instead, ignorant to his inner conflict, a rare glimmer of empathy in her eyes as she addresses him by his first name. 

He nods, and says yes to all her questions because he's practised enough to know that her list on the clipboard is the only thing standing between him and freedom. 

Choji and the rest of the team thankfully make a full recovery, but Naruto can't bring himself to go see them as they heal. There's a well of guilt inside his heart that tries to overflow when he thinks about how their scrapes and breaks meant nothing, all because he couldn't bring Sasuke back. 

Gaara approaches him just before his second departure from the Leaf Village. He finds the blonde perched on a terracotta roof and for a while, they simply lounge side-by-side and watch the sun descend into burning red and pink hues. They seem to find understanding within the howl of the wind whistling between them. Even once all the sunlight is bled from the sky, they stay unmoving, Gaara's comfort within the darkness painted by the sunken purple skin cradling his eyes. 

"You said you'd do anything to protect your precious people." Gaara states, tone devoid from emotion. 

"Yeah," Naruto clears his throat, "but apparently, I'm not very good at it." He grumbles, eyes finally slipping from the navy sea to study the dusty surface under him. 

He sees Gaara turn to him out of the corner of his eye. "Why do you act as if it is over?" He questions bluntly. 

Naruto's short fuse made shorter by his emotional exhaustion burns out, adding a scratch to his voice. "Because it is! Sasuke is gone, and I put my friends in the hospital for nothing!" He huffed angrily, scuffing his hands through dishevelled spikes of hair. 

Gaara doesn't answer instantly, waiting for Naruto's exhales to stop flaring his nostrils before he decides to speak again. He was not ignorant of his own lack of empathy, and indeed, he did not understand Naruto's inner conflict. His hope shines too bright for Gaara to ever see eye-to-eye without squinting. When Naruto looks to be ready, he says simply,

_ " _ _ Dead _ is gone."

The statement sparks frustration within Naruto— a biting remark on his tongue— but the heat from his blood is swept away by icy winds, cooling him slowly with the realisation the Sand-Nin is _ right. _

He swallows the thought and finally turns back to meet Gaara's dull green eyes. 

"Hey," Naruto says, no signs of his previous brood of thoughts.

Gaara continues to stare, showing Naruto already has his full attention, and he's not really sure why Naruto had to verbally confirm it. 

Naruto's upper body leans to the side, purposely putting himself off balance. His shoulder collides with Gaara's, and he freezes up instantly. Naruto's weight is slumped against the Red-head's arm, completely lax. He's beginning to look like he's regretting coming up here to comfort the Uzumaki, when said boy's voice breaks the shiver of wind. 

"You're a good friend." 

Gaara gives himself whiplash, and later that day, scares the hell out of his siblings when Naruto flings himself into Gaara's— _ surprisingly— _ open arms. 

Naruto starts his days anew after then, each moment of happiness acting as a single stitch to the patchwork over the hole in his chest. The emptiness under his skin that only he can see. 

Sakura comforts him with softness no one else seemed to have time for. He's beyond grateful to his teammate and curses himself for not genuinely appreciating her sooner. She watches him scream his lungs raw, drilling spirals into training logs from dawn to dust. Wiping single tears from the corners of his mourning blue eyes before they have the chance to fall— because they're _Ninja,_ _and Ninja do not cry._ She holds his hand with fingers that are too thin, too nimble— to ever feel the same— and leads them to Ichiraku. It fills his belly with warmth, but not in the same way that Sasuke's curry would. 

_ [Trust _ ** _Sasuke _ ** _ to somehow find a way to make ramen unappealing.] _

He forces himself to swallow all the broth, stubborn to not let Sasuke— _ even in his absence— _ win. He cast a sidelong glance at Sakura, who sips at her tea. "Do you miss him, Sakura-chan?" He asks.

Her brows dip as she turns to him, adopting a sad look. "Oh, Naruto," She says softly, "you can't miss what you never had." Her expression turns bittersweet, a smile too tight as she places her cup loudly back to the table. 

Sakura had sliced Sasuke clean from her heart, shedding the weight of unrequited love from her body. He watches her bloom from bud, the potential for greatness unfurling her into something amazing. Ironically, he thinks she has begun to leave him behind. Sakura leaps eagerly into what her future holds without Sasuke, and it is bright, colourful and vibrant with rewards. Tsunade trains her until she is barely recognisable from the pale shell of her academy self. 

He holds her tightly and watches as she grows into a figure of fearsome grace and power.

He doesn't have a lot to lose when he agrees to leave the Village with Pervy Sage. Tsunade says he needs to get out of the Village before it suffocates him, Shizune says she shouldn't say such controversial things as leader of said "suffocating" Village. 

Sakura bids him goodbye with a crushing hold, and tells him, "You come back, Naruto. You come _ home _ to us, _ to me." _ He hugs her back, inhales the smell of her shampoo and imprints her to memory. Doesn't speak a word about how unsettling her departing words sit within him. 

_ [Doesn't dare tell anyone that the Village hasn't really felt like home since Sasuke left.] _

While travelling, Naruto realises that Grannie is a lot smarter than she looks, because, for the first time in his life, he discovers freedom. He learns that he's been breathing from within in a cage, that the air outside of the fire nation feels different within his cells. Jiraiya teaches him to live outside of routine, how to barter with merchants, how to live off the clothes on your body, and how to make quick easy money. Many learning curves bend Naruto into awkward situations— namely, the curve of a woman's bust against his spine as his Perverted teacher sends him an enthusiastic thumbs-up, and swats a palm of cash on the table for two rooms.

Naruto isn't really sure how to emotionally feel about discovering this new sexual feature of life._ Really _ discovering, since it turns out to be utterly different to his research for the Oiroke no Jutsu. Leaving him boneless and satisfied on a purely physical level, but mentally not really understanding the hype, and wishing the tea house girl didn't feel so impersonal. It had been so long since anyone touched him intimately, leaving him more than willing when the brunette had eased him back into the cushioned bed and whispered in his ear with a voice sweet like candy, _ "don't worry handsome, baby's gonna' show you a good time." _

In the morning, Jiraiya loudly claps him on the back as they set off. He doesn't tell his concerns to Pervy Sage, because he seemed proud of Naruto for whatever reason— and that he doesn't mind feeling. 

He tries it again a few times through their travels, but every time seems to concrete the theory it's clearly not really his thing, and he would instead get in the hot spring himself rather than watch the other side. 

They'd passed through Suna some weeks ago, when Naruto had insisted they stop so that he could smother Gaara in a hug, and gush about his travels and Gaara's promoting position to Kazekage. They were passing through a small trading post along the outskirts of the land of Sand when Naruto caught the tail of a nagging familiar feeling. He left Pervy Sage at the bar, informing the other he was finding a place to crash for the night. The skitter along his skin became further irritating the closer he tried to recognise it. It sat like an odour in the air, a weight on his mind even in the darkness of his own hotel room. His senses suddenly flared in alarm as he rips a kunai from his weapon pouch, spinning heel to face the person sitting casually on the edge of his bed. 

He recognises the silhouette quickly, eyes widening with recognition. His heart only seems to drum faster when he realises who it is.

"Bastard." He grits, barely able to recognise his own words.

"You're as un-observant as ever, idiot." Sasuke replies, voice smug as it ever was. It lacks it's boyish high tone, instead replacing it with a deep sharpness that makes it hard to focus on what he's actually saying. 

Naruto had dreamt of the day he would finally meet Sasuke again many times. He imagined it in a way that made his heart ache and his blood boil, how he would hurt Sasuke so bad he might begin to understand how much Naruto was hurting. He would drag Sasuke back with him kicking and screaming, the hatred in their eyes burning a path across battlefields. 

He never expected to unite under the cover of night in a hotel room on foreign lands. 

"What are you doing here?" He asks, trying to hide his eager curiosity behind his anger. 

"I'd imagine similar reasons to you." He says with a slight shrug, drawing Naruto's attention how his hair seems to be longer, his fringe sitting differently over his face. 

Naruto's brain whirrs at the thought of the Snake Sannin in the vicinity. "Orochimaru's here?" He growls accusingly. 

Sasuke frowns. "No. Some of us don't need a _ babysitter _to know when we're leashed." He returns pointedly with equal levels of aggravation. 

"I'm _ not-" _ Naruto's teeth snap before Sasuke interrupts him, glaring. 

"You're still so blind." 

"You _ left, _ what do _ you _know-"

"What I _ know _was enough to warrant my reasons for leaving." Sasuke snaps, barely loud enough to be called a shout. 

Naruto pauses where his younger self would have no doubt retaliated wildly. "Then _ tell _ me." Naruto swallows, hating how the plea is so apparent in his voice. _ "Don't go back to that slimy bastard." _He tags on when Sasuke gives no such indication of replying, his annoyance dwindling as his chest begins to ache at the thought. 

"And instead, _ what, _ go back to the _ Leaf?" _ Sasuke says, disgust and loathing entwined with mention of the Village. 

Naruto looks down at the floor, struggling to conjure the will to defend Konoha, hating the way he feels as though he's betraying his Village and his precious people when he croaks out, "come back to _ me." _

He hears Sasuke get up from the bed, shoes shuffling across the crummy carpet to stand in front of him. 

"I tried to kill you" He quips, as if to remind him. The blonde doesn't dare look up, shaking his head in bowed refusal. 

"Shut up, Bastard. You're a liar." Naruto's _ not _ an idiot, he's _ not, _ no matter how much anyone calls him one. He's had more than enough time on his travels to ponder and think. Sasuke always had the best aim in every class. The only thing better than his aim was his mastery of manipulation, spinning someone into the pirouette of his Sharingan was only _ one _ method. He could have his opponent wrapped up into thinking they were losing before they _ actually _were— a skill Naruto would never think to harness. 

Sasuke wouldn't kill him, he just needed Naruto to _ think _he would. To hurt Naruto enough to keep him from blindly running back a hundred times over. 

"I hurt you," Sasuke says instead, uncaring to deny Naruto's claim. 

Naruto's head finally perks, tilting ever so slightly to the side in feline challenge, staring into midnight orbs. "Make it up to me." 

"How presumptuous of you." He mocks, smirking in a very Sasuke way, making Naruto realise just how much he _ missed _ that stupid, smug face. 

He barely leans forward before Naruto makes a predatory grab at Sasuke's waist, crushing the gap between them with toned, hard bodies. Sasuke hardly falls willingly into Naruto's space, allowing himself to be pulled into the slot fitted at Naruto's front. Their lips collide roughly, all biting pressure and desperate licks to taste as much of each other as possible. 

The wound against his heart bleeds, reminding Naruto of the pain this cruel person has caused him. But even now, Naruto reasons with his sorrow, shows it how Sasuke seems to carry inside him his own sadness, some sort of agony that ignites at the sight of Naruto. He supposes maybe, he should be happy that he can at least cause Sasuke that pain, _ but then again, _ he supposes that he's known _ that _all along.

* * *

**Xx Smut Scene starts here xX**

With a hard shove, Sasuke falls back onto the bed, mattress creaking as Naruto descends over the other boy, trapping him with the cage of his limbs and forcing their hips to jut together. Neither of them let out a peep of acknowledgement, but their eyes fly open to the issue of challenge.

"You've changed, Naruto." The Uchiha whispers, voice sultry with delight. It causes a spark of pride crackle to life, because he _ has. _ When Sasuke was still in the Village, Naruto wasn't able to handle a mere flicker of the passionate flare he now possesses. Touch-shy and desires unknown, he hadn't _ wanted _to be ready. But things changed, he grew up. 

Sasuke's outfit also changed, he noticed, as the moonlight finally reveals the side profile of Sasuke's body pressed beneath him. 

"You too, bastard, you look really stupid." He scoffs with a snicker under his breath.

Sasuke scowls, raising a single leg sharply in response. Naruto's eyes rip open in instinctual panic, twisting himself awkwardly to grab Sasuke's knee with an iron grip before it makes contact with his crotch. 

_ "Hey! _ What the hell, Bastard!?" He yelps, a little breathless. 

"I can leave now, you know." Sasuke grits, eyes squinted with the threat. In response, something possessive crawls out from the recesses of Naruto's mind, focus seeking out the muscular shoulder beneath him hiding the mark he'd last left claim on when he had felt like this. He could feel the monster within him rise from it's tamed slumber, knowing his eyes had changed by the way Sasuke's gaze sharpens, interested. 

Naruto feels a fingerprint dare to thumb at his lips as a palm rests over his cheekbone, and all he wants is to bite those wicked fingers away. A nimble finger slips between sharp incisors, taunting Naruto with his pulse against tongue, as it shyly laps at the digit. A warm trail of salvia draws across his chin as the hand recedes, holding his face as if to force his attention back to Sasuke's thin lips. 

They kiss softer this time, partly in wariness to not tear Sasuke's mouth to pieces with Naruto's teeth. Quick fingers waste no time in shedding themselves of clothing, admiring the way moonlight bathes over the shudders of defined muscle. Gone was their previous baby fat, cushioned innocence no longer hiding the angle of hip bones and sharpness of chiselled chests. Their hands wander, hungry to trace the new, yet so profoundly intimate edges of their bodies. Hazed red eyes ensnare each other over panting breaths, showing the commitment Sasuke had taken to memorise every skin quivering detail. 

Naruto can feel the brief points of contact setting off a burn under his skin that he fears will increase beyond their control. His mouth releases suction from around a pink nipple with a wet sound, ghosting his teeth over the side of a firm pectoral as he glides upward. Sasuke's hand grabs a fistful of gold hair, unguided pressure neither a push or pull as those deadly jaws lap at the Curse Mark like a lion ready to feast. Soiled, dirtied down to his blood, by a vile existence. Naruto wanted to tear it from flesh as much as Sasuke craved the purge. With neither able to be quenched, they remained stagnant, throttled by intoxicating desires. Teeth mar skin like a glutton through butter, leaving the drag of red over collarbones and blotching into ugly smears of vandalism as Naruto selfishly writes himself into the Uchiha's skin. 

Sasuke's breath finally breaks from its confines, rattling out from his throat in a guttural, prideless sound. He tugs on Naruto's hair hard enough to throw him to the side, toppling them over as his twists, spine curling him gracefully around to lay slyly atop his partner. 

Naruto snarls lightly, not appreciating their swap of positions and the lack of access to milky skin. Sasuke's expression twists into something positively _nasty_ and rocks his sex against the groove of Naruto's V-line, barely allowing their scorched skin to touch. 

"Hahh,_ fuckin-" _ Naruto's breath catches "-tease."

"You _ wish _you were fucking a tease." The other boy quips. 

Naruto's brain stutters. _ "Wait-" _

"When you fucked those girls," Sasuke punctuates, a firm grip sliding down Naruto's member, as if to imitate the clench of a tea-house whore. Naruto's head tilts back towards the ceiling as his mouth falls open slightly. 

"Did they squeal and moan under you like a lover? Drive your cock into their cunts with meaningless abandon? Did you paw at their breasts like a suckling kitten, desperate and needy?" He questions, words deadly as he pumps harder on Naruto's dick and stares openly to watch the blonde's features scrunch in pleasure, sweat beading down his brow. 

"Yes- _ Fuck, _ Sasuke-" He says between panting breaths, hardly registering the string of fiction-worthy words cascading from the person he thought to be a prude.

"Did you _ like _it?" The raven pries, roughly shoving the juvenile hips below him back to the bed from where they had raised to buck further into the warmth of Sasuke's hand. 

_ "Hahh, _ no- _ no, _ felt, felt wrong- _ gods, _ no, I _ swear-" _

"Well, I _ 'swear,' _ I'm never going to let you enjoy the sweetness of a _ slut _ again." Sasuke interrupts, watching intently as craving eyes fly open to fully look at him, maybe to even check it wasn't an insane figure of Naruto’s imagination. 

"What? I said I didn't-" Confusion fumbles his words only to be cut off again when Sasuke's torso above him _ drops, _their chests flush as he pins down tanned arms whilst nuzzling his face into the side of Naruto's jaw.

"I'm going to fuck you, until your body remembers nothing but the _ shape of me _ inside you the moment you _ think _of sex." He whispers, the words drying the moisture straight from Naruto's mouth and leave it dripping from his prick.

Sasuke bends his body until he feels even his _ pride _ stretch, then bends him _ further. _

_ [He would've cried out that he was going to break, if only they didn't already know that he was a broken man— fractured in at least ten places at any given time, his heart brutally divided by the chunk Sasuke had laid claim on all those years ago.] _

They do it several times, _ again, _ and _ again _ with only brief lapses in exhaustion between. A couple times they have to pause to check they haven't rocked the mattress off the bed frame— or into the wall. Their bodies are disgusting, even after the brief shower post first round when they both discovered how much better it would be without the grime of a full day's travel. 

The moment sunlight crept into the room to lounge over the stained hotel carpet, Sasuke had extracted himself from the tangle of Naruto's limbs— as if he too, had to leave with the darkness of night. 

Naruto's whole body ached with foreign pains, and even with eyelashes batting away dried sleep, he made a full-body lunge to stop his former teammate leaving the bed. A whine slips from between his lips as he catches the other man around the waist and hugs firmly, forehead leaning against a back painted with barely scabbed claw marks and bruises. 

Sasuke sighs, and in a surprisingly domestic manor, runs his fingers softly over the arms around his middle. "I'm never going back, Naruto." He says with certainty. 

"To the Village?" Naruto grumbles, voice muffled with sleep.

"To the Village." He confirms, waiting for the question they both knew would follow. 

"-And to me?" Naruto asks, barely audible in the silent ambience of sunrise. 

_ "Dumbass," _Sasuke replies instead of giving explanation, his tone lacking a trace of malice. 

It's very Sasuke-like. In his irritating, characteristically douchebag -way. 

**Xx End of Smut xX**

* * *

Naruto doesn't remember what happened after that, memory terrifyingly blank. He's a little insecure as to whether it was exhaustion or product of Sasuke's Sharingan. Still, either way, no trace of him could be found when Naruto wakes the second time. Something in him feels different after that night, fulfilled like someone has finally coloured in the blanks of his mind. He feels the crevasse dividing his heart and his dream gape wider, because he stops thinking about going back to Leaf at all, and instead starts thinking about the next time he will see Sasuke. His dream of being Hokage seems to dwindle under the freedom of fresh air, and he's afraid of the day he won't even feel like _ Naruto _anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was going to follow canon, and then...I didn't.  
Telll meee wwhhaaat you tthiiink please <3

**Author's Note:**

> based off [this post](https://maelstrom-prince.tumblr.com/post/186434415122/wrongdeductions2-my-otp-they-love-each-other) on Tumblr. 
> 
> Big thank you to [falterth](https://archiveofourown.org/users/falterth/pseuds/falterth) and [alexodian](https://archiveofourown.org/users/alexodian) for Beta-ing!


End file.
